I got the idea from Speed, you know the SandyB movie? It wasn’t a difficult hack. There are instructions if you know where to look. They’d been much more relaxed about lending me the car. Fewer lectures about the lighting on the road near the church. Fewer comments about how lucky I am, how when they were young… and fewer insinuations about “appropriate behaviour” as they glanced knowingly at their Show device on the sideboard. I played along for a few Saturday nights: impeccable driving, sober and somber behaviour inside. But tonight, the loop is set. I have the keys.